Horrible, yet inspirational in a way

Earlier this week, a regional landmark suffered a terrible blow. August had been a pretty dry month up until the end, and the sudden heavy rains we started getting caused the roof of a local theater to collapse. To add insult to injury, a section of the roof over the stage had actually been replaced, just a few years ago (that section stayed up). It’s a huge amount of damage to what had been a beautiful old building. And the real kicker? An initial investigation suggests that the rainwater pooled because the drainage channels had been blocked by pigeons, of all things. Freaking pigeons. That brings us to today’s word.

collet, noun – a flange designed to hold a gem

Learned from: Blasphemous (Switch, PC, Playstation 4, XBox One)

Developed by The Game Kitchen

Published by Team17 (2019)

There aren’t many “normal” items to find in Blasphemous, and the Dove Skull certainly doesn’t break that trend. The actual skull of a bird, described as being “drilled as a collet,” it’s a trinket you can equip to slightly bolster your defense. It’s slightly morbid, but compared to a lot of the items in the game, it’s not that bad.

I’m not going to go much in depth on the game today, because the damage to the Vista Theater is still so fresh in my mind. The photo below really illustrates how bad the situation is, but if you find yourself wanting to help, please consider making a donation to try and help them start putting the pieces back together. Thank you.

Finally, perhaps we can take something positive away from this. If something as common and unremarkable as pigeons can collapse a brick and mortar structure with their nests, maybe there’s a chance that normal folks like you and me can change the world on a large scale as well–just in a more positive context.

vista

Image credit to http://www.uppermichiganssource.com

Pluto is in marmalade: ill fortune!

I probably shouldn’t joke about this too loudly; given the propensity toward essential oils and goji berries that some people in my country have, I don’t want to give them ideas about regressing to Medieval “cures” for diseases. And this is related to today’s word, but first I’d like to apologize for being gone for so long. I was training someone in at work for a few weeks, and life in general had gotten more draining somehow. But I did find some time amidst all that to play a few games. Such as this one.

borage, noun – a flowering herb native to the Mediterranean; also known as starflower

Learned from: Astrologaster (PC, mobile)

Developed by Nyamnyam

Published by Nyamnyam (2019)

Astrologaster is sort of a fully-narrated choose your own adventure game. You play as “doctor” Simon Forman, a 16th-century astrologer who sets his sights on medicine after the stars tell him how to cure the plague (a cure he calls “strong water,” which includes, among other things, borage). The only problem is, he doesn’t have a medical license. Since posing as a doctor without a license is a crime in Elizabethan Londan, Simon sets out to acquire one the only way he knows how–not through study and scholarship, but through providing sound medical advice through astrology. What could possibly go wrong?

And it’s not just people’s health that you’ll be dealing with. You’ll also consult the stars to offer advice on investments, love affairs, and even military campaigns. Things can go horribly (and at times hilariously) awry, and you can intentionally sabotage people if you want, but it’ll make it harder to get the recommendations you need to get your license.

That is, of course, when Simon isn’t sabotaging himself. Without spoiling anything, I will say that he becomes a rather…unlikable character as the story goes on, doing things behind the scenes that the player (as far as I can tell) has no control over. This made it a bit of a chore to finish the game, in all honesty, because after awhile I wasn’t really sure I wanted to see him succeed. Still, there’s a colorful cast of characters, some solid voice acting, and writing that’s genuinely funny at times. If the overall premise sounds appealing, you’ll probably enjoy Astrologaster to some extent.

borage

Fun fact: While edible (and pretty), borage contains chemicals that may be carcinogenic. Not recommended for the treatment of plague.

What’s in a name?

If you’re like me, the current state of things has you pretty frustrated. I considered a bunch of words that would reflect different aspects of the aggravation I’m feeling about how poorly people (in my country at least) are responding to the COVID-19 pandemic, when I realized I could sum it all up in one. It’s not so much the word itself, but rather the game it’s from.

halitosis, noun – bad breath

Learned from: Aaargh! (Apple IIGS, Amiga, Amstrad CPC, Atari ST, Arcade, Commodore 64, PC, ZX Spectrum)

Developed by Binary Design, Sculpted Software

Published by Arcadia Systems, Melbourne House (1988)

Aaargh! is an early attempt at portraying giant monster battles in a game. But in the absence of licensed properties like Godzilla, Ultraman, or King Kong, the developers had to make do with a generic giant lizard, and an “ogre” (which, for some reason, they actually drew as a cyclops). The two monsters were basically sprite swaps, since they each had the same moves, though the ogre certainly got the short end of the stick, thematically. Instead of the lizard’s actual fire breath, he was described as having “halitosis, which is so bad it sets things on fire.” And yes, I dug up the manual to find the exact wording, after twenty-odd years. I’m dedicated. 😉

The game itself was technically less about beating up the other monster, and more about finding the eggs of a giant bird, hidden in a primitive village before your opponent did. (The actual type of bird is another word I learned from this game, but that’s a post for another time.) It was…okay for what it was trying to do, but there are reasons it was overshadowed by Rampage, which came out a few years earlier and offered more robust gameplay. Plus, there’s that title…

aaargh

Aaargh! indeed.

Does anybody really know what time it is?

While my Pile of Shame (TM) still has a ton of games in it, I figured the quarantine was a good opportunity to tackle some of the longer ones–JRPGs, and such. Recently, I finished the first Trails in the Sky, and I see why the Legend of Heroes series (which includes the Sky trilogy, the Cold Steel quadrilogy, and two un-localized games in between them) is so highly regarded by fans. The plot is a slow burn until the final chapter, but once it kicks into high gear, it leads to one hell of a cliffhanger. Anyway, today’s word…

tourbillon, noun – a watch mechanism designed to mitigate gravity’s effect on the movement of the gears

Learned from: Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky (PSP, PC, Playstation 3, Playstation Vita)

Developed by Nihon Falcom

Published by XSeed Games (2011)

Literally meaning “whirlwind,” the use of “tourbillon” in Trails in the Sky was in a more mechanical sense. Much of the society in the game is based around technology derived from ancient artifacts (naturally). Called “orbments,” these devices combine clockwork mechanisms and elemental crystals to produce everything from street lights, to airships, to weapons. And as with all steampunk-ish technology, things can always be fine-tuned, hence the inclusion of tourbillons in some tech to make it more stable/accurate.

There’s actually quite a bit more depth behind the history of the orbments, as well as pretty much every aspect of the world in this series. Hell, even most of the individual townsfolk you run across have individual names, agendas, and dialog that’s more than “Welcome to <NAME OF TOWN>!” The sheer amount of text here can weigh things down a bit, but if you’re the sort of person who’d, say, read all the books in Skyrim, you’ll probably love getting immersed in the history of Liberl. Even if you don’t look through all the extra stuff, the tension and interplay between various factions of the military, the Bracer guild (sort of an international police/mercenary force), and the ruling family is plenty intriguing on its own.

tl;dr: If Trails in the Sky is any indication, this series is an underappreciated gem in the West. And all the games that have been translated into English are now available on Steam, so you don’t even have to be a weirdo who owns a PSP, like me, to enjoy them!

trails_in_the_sky

It’s also got quite the colorful cast of characters.

Easter in quarantine

I’m not going to say “happy Easter,” because most of the things that people seem to like best about the holiday are things that they really shouldn’t be doing right now. If you’re having an egg hunt, I hope it’s indoors, or that you have a fenced lawn. Much as you miss your families, you really shouldn’t have them over for dinner. And if you’re smart, you’re not going to church, because if there are a bunch of people clustered together, the virus doesn’t care where they are. It’s understandable if this makes you feel sad, frustrated, or even guilty, but staying home and staying safe is objectively more important than putting yourself and others at risk, simply because tradition calls for it. And in a roundabout way, that brings us to today’s word.

biliary, adj. – of, or relating to the bile ducts or gall bladder

Learned from: Blasphemous (Nintendo Switch, PC, Playstation 4, XBox One)

Developed by The Game Kitchen

Published by Team17 (2019)

Blasphemous is essentially Catholic Guilt: The Video Game. It’s a 2D metroidvania full of quasi-religious imagery, where everything joyful is a sin, and if a person is suffering, that means they’re blessed. It’s twisted and grim, and a perfect example of a Kickstarter project done right. You play as the Penitent One in Silence (there are other Penitent Ones with different burdens they carry), as he tries to atone for whatever sins he’s committed, by slashing his way through an oppressive world suffused with twisted faith. Your sword is gradually piercing its way into your own flesh, you regularly anoint yourself with the blood of your foes, and your health items are biliary flasks (that admittedly look more like they’re filled with blood than bile).

In short, the game is metal. Less short, it’s a beautifully realized world, with great pixel art, plenty of secrets to find, and gameplay that’s a comfortable challenge. So if you’re stuck at home today, and looking for something new to play, consider giving this one a shot.

blasphemous

I could make a “he is risen” joke, but that’s low-hanging fruit. Also, bad grammar.

Nice body work

So, the other day, the first images of the Playstation 5 controller were finally released, and I have to say, it’s a sleek piece of hardware. As a friend of mine put it, it’s like they took the time travel suits from Avengers: Endgame, and turned them into a controller. He’s not entirely wrong–this thing is slick. And in a roundabout way, that brings us to today’s word.

chassis, noun – the supporting frame of a structure (as a vehicle or appliance); also: the frame and working parts (as of a car or electronic device), exclusive to the body or housing

Learned from: MissionForce: Cyberstorm (PC)

Developed by Dynamix

Published by Sierra Entertainment (1996)

MissionForce: Cyberstorm has the kind of title you might get from taking a few spins on an X-TREME ’90s version of roulette. But as a game, it was a somewhat deep, turn-based strategy game with mechs–mechs that you could customize from chassis, to loadouts, to pilots. But really, what it might be best-known for (if indeed, it’s known at all these days), is the fact that each box came with two copies of the game. These days, with all the worry over piracy, and the invasive DRM software in place to try and fight it, giving away an extra copy of a game for free would be nigh-unthinkable. Then again, maybe the developers weren’t confident enough that it would sell, without giving it that extra push, to help generate word of mouth (and considering the quality of the game, that wouldn’t be surprising). Either way, it was a cool little bonus at the time.

PS5-Controller_04-07-20

This is the DualSense controller for the PS5. Its design is futuristic, sleek, and pretty damn appealing if I do say so myself.

Cyberstorm_Cover

This is the box for MissionForce: Cyberstorm. It’s, erm….none of those things.

Bodies at rest

I’m sure most of you are under some level of quarantine at this point. Even I, who falls under the “essential worker” category in my state, am currently in the middle of what amounts to a four-day weekend. I’m reading more, whittling down my to-read/watch/play piles, and heck, I’ve even started painting again. By no means do I intend to make light of the COVID-19 situation, but I could get used to this. Which brings us to today’s word.

inertia, noun – the tendency for a body at rest or in motion to remain so, unless acted upon by an outside source

Learned from: Star Control (Genesis, Amiga, Amstrad CPC, Commodore 64, PC, ZX Spectrum)

Developed by Toys for Bob

Published by Accolade (1990)

Part of me wishes I’d been a bit older when I first played Star Control, because there were a lot of bits of parody that I didn’t get way back in the early ‘90s. From androids having letter designations of tax forms, to the ships of the all-female race of Syreen being shaped like marital aids, most of it sailed right over my naïve, innocent head. What stuck with and captivated me however, was the incredibly addictive combat.

Each of the 15 different races had their own style of ship, with its own unique set of primary and secondary weapons. Everything from cloaking devices, to automated fighter drones, to acidic bubbles made an appearance in this game, and some of the matchups were incredibly fun. The battle between a lightly-armored, inertia-less Arilou fighter, against a hulking Ur-Quan Dreadnought remains one of my favorite in the game, in an Ajax vs. Achilles sort of way: speed vs. raw destructive power and all that good stuff.

Again, they don’t make covers like this anymore, and that’s a shame.

Welcome to the world of tomorrow!

For this entry, I find myself in the odd position of writing about a game that hasn’t been released yet. I’ll explain in a moment.

oniric, adj. – variant of oneiric: dreamlike or pertaining to dreams

Learned from: Iris and the Giant (projected platforms: PC, PS4, Switch, XBox One)

Developed by Louis Rigaud

Published by Goblinz Studio, Maple Whispering Limited (projected release: 2020)

So, I was scrolling through my Facebook feed today, and an ad for this game showed up, proclaiming it to be a “roguelike oniric deckbuilder”. I knew what two of those words meant, but I’d never heard the term “oniric” before. After looking it up, and perusing some of the screenshots on Steam, I can say it does look rather dreamlike. As a fan of deckbuilding games (100+ hours in Slay the Spire, and counting), and the randomness of roguelikes, I may have to give this one a shot whenever it comes out–I almost feel I owe it that much for already teaching me a new word.

iris

I do love how indie games are willing to experiment with different art styles.

My coworkers can’t spell

In the back storage room where I work, there’s a bunch of stuff that probably hasn’t been touched in years: paper files dating back almost a decade, microfilm copies of records that are older still, outdated equipment, etc. There is also, inexplicably, a plastic container of 3.5″ floppy disks, labeled, and I quote: “MICS DISCS”. Putting aside the fact that “discs” should be spelled with a K in this instance, they abbreviated “miscellaneous” wrong. Which brings to mind today’s word.

miscellaneous, adj. – not falling into any set category, having numerous and varied traits

Learned from: Dragon Wars (Apple II, Amiga, Commodore 64, Tandy, PC)

Developed by Interplay Productions, Kemco (NES version)

Published by Activision (1989)

Dragon Wars was a first-person dungeon crawler, that had more of an RPG aspect than some other games in the genre (there were actually NPCs to talk to, and choices you made actually mattered, so it wasn’t all about the combat/puzzles). It was a difficult, at times weird game that had an unexpected amount of depth. And to some degree, that depth extended to the magic system.

There weren’t really character classes in Dragon Wars, per se, and it was really a character’s stats and training that determined what they were good at. So, you might have someone who’s really skilled in Sun Magic, but had no High Magic spells. If I remember correctly, there were five schools of magic: Low (entry-level stuff), High (better versions of Low spells, and more versatility), Sun (for those who really wanted to cast the spells that make the people fall down), Druid (less damage, more summoning), and finally, Miscellaneous. I don’t think there were many spells in Miscellaneous Magic, and thematically they didn’t seem to fit anywhere else–sort of a haste spell, and a high damage spell that wasn’t elemental or sun-based, I think. There may have been more, but I honestly don’t recall. But if it really was only that handful, it seems like they could’ve found some way to tweak them so they’d fit in a different school, and get rid of the pointless appendix that was Miscellaneous Magic.

Just like we should really just get rid of “MICS DISCS” at work. I’m sure Mic won’t miss them.

dragon_wars

Unrelated note, but I really do miss hand-painted box art. They don’t make ’em like this anymore.

1,000 Points of Light

By this point, I’m sure most of you know about the situation in Australia. If somehow you aren’t, the continent is on fire. Millions of animals have died, thousands of people have been displaced, and as of right now, the fires show no signs of stopping. Today’s word should be self-explanatory….

inferno, noun – an intense, uncontrollable blaze

Learned from: Shadowgate (Apple IIGS, Atari ST, Amiga, CD-I, Game Boy Color, Macintosh, NES, Palm OS, PC, mobile phone)

Developed by ICOM Simulations, Inc.

Published by Mindscape (1987), (Kemco, 1989 for the NES)

Far from the real-world horrorscape that is Australia right now, opening a door to find just an entire chasm full of fire seems downright passe. Shadowgate was known for being unpredictable. Each door, or hatch, or hallway could just as easily lead to a wizard’s laboratory, or a dragon’s hoard, or a bridge over a sea of flames. The sheer variety of scenes led to an equally broad set of creative solutions in order to progress.

Sadly, there’s no icy crystal orb we can shatter against the ground to put out the infernos raging across Australia. Indeed, once you see some of the photos from the area, it can be easy to feel like there’s no solution at all. And for any one of us, that’s true. Fortunately, fixing this–or any other problem of this scope–doesn’t fall on the shoulders of any one person. The most any one of us can do is what we can. If you’re inclined to spit in the face of impossible odds, and do all that anyone could ask, this article has a list of things you can do to help, at the bottom. Again, no one person could be expected to do all of them, but any of us could do at least one.