2020 in a word

I think we can all agree, this has been a terrible year. Does anyone even remember that things started off with a huge chunk of Australia being on fire? Or that the rain forests of Brazil followed suit? When practically half the planet is engulfed in flames, and it somehow faded from the public consciousness, you know it’s been an utterly abysmal year. Which brings us to today’s word.

septage, noun – sewage, human waste, especially: the contents of a septic tank

Learned from: Remnant: From the Ashes (Playstation 4, PC, XBox One)

Developed by Gunfire Games

Published by Perfect World Entertainment (2019)

I recently decided to pick this game back up, after close to a year. Back then, I’d been trying to talk some friends into picking it up to play through the campaign together, but they were too focused on Destiny 2, and later The Division 2, to have time for another game. At the time, I was kind of frustrated by this, so I set the game aside, until this past month, when I decided to just try to soldier through it on my own.

This was a mistake.

Remnant is a perfectly fine game, if a bit light on setup/story. The procedurally-generated levels randomize more than just the maps, but also quests, and even bosses…and this is where things fell apart for me. I was playing a long-range character, and the first boss I came to relentlessly charged in, giving me no room to breathe or set things up. Worse, he periodically spawned other enemies that charged in at me…and these guys explode when they get close. It was a nightmare…for one person. And I realized, Remnant is really designed for multiplayer, but the friends I have who are into these sorts of games probably wouldn’t be satisfied with the loot system (enemies don’t drop anything but money and ammo, meaning you’ll never randomly get a better weapon unless you find one on the map…and items don’t reset once you’ve picked something up), or the slow burn it takes to get any cool gear. Faster-paced games have spoiled them.

But, who cares, right? Where’s the word? Well, the loading screens (which I saw a lot of, from dying so much) cycle through item descriptions, mostly for things I never found, because I didn’t get far enough. One of them was some sort of “calling bell,” the description of which described an alien race whose young were incubated in “holy septage” or something like that. I have no idea what these creatures are, or what story significance this has, but it sounds interesting as heck…so I’m a little sad that (at a respectable difficulty setting at least), I’ll probably never experience more of this world. Maybe one of these days I’ll swallow my pride and try again at “normal” or even “easy” difficulty, but that feels wrong, somehow. Right now though, it’s all too frustrating.

Much like this year, and the way my country has handled the pandemic. May 2021 be less shitty.

This is Gorefist, who kept wiping the floor with me. The fact that he sounds like a rejected Rob Liefeld character may be the crappiest thing of all….

Have a very scary solstice

December is chock-full of holidays, and regardless of their individual religious connections, there’s a very good reason for that: the winter solstice. During the darkest time of the year, when the days–let alone the nights–are freezing, and light seems to be fading from the world, people needed an excuse to be happy. Even before 2020. Today’s word isn’t the happiest, but it does fit, thematically.

fuliginous, adj. – sooty, smoky, dirty

Learned from: Darkest Dungeon (PC, Mac, mobile, Playstation 4, Playstation Vita, Switch, XBox One)

Developed by Red Hook Studios

Published by Red Hook Studios (2016)

I have a certain fondness for games that are punishingly difficult: Dark Souls and its ilk, the Shin Megami Tensei series, etc. Darkest Dungeon is no exception. Your characters are as likely to go insane from the stress of exploring your family’s estate, as they are to die of actual physical damage. Pathological fears, obsessive compulsions, and strange fixations can cripple them more than any injury or disease. And sometimes when one of them succumbs to this stress, they have some colorful, almost H.P. Lovecraft-level purple prose to accompany it–such as the occultist who cried out about the pull of the “fuliginous abyss” calling to him, or something like that, before he lunged for the clearly evil altar in the middle of the room.

So yeah, your characters will occasionally do things that are outside your control, and those things can sometimes lead to the death of your entire party, like when they activate a ritual to open a rift in time and space, and some tentacled horror picks them apart, one by one. As long as you don’t mind setbacks like that, it’s an incredible game.

Pay to win

A friend of mine recently talked me into trying out Crusader Kings III, since it was on sale on Steam. And while I’m still just getting started, I’ve already learned quite a lot from this game, like dukes wielded more power and governed more land than counts (who were on the same level as earls), and that all of them outranked barons. And that’s just something I picked up from the tutorial section, along with today’s word.

scutage, noun – a tax imposed by a Medieval lord, in place of military service

Learned from: Crusader Kings III (PC, Mac)

Developed by Paradox Development Studio

Published by Paradox Interactive (2020)

I never knew just buying your way out of fighting was an option, until I played Crusader Kings III. I’d always just assumed that if your king went to war, and raised the call to arms, that was that (short of some Game of Thrones-style political scheming and treason). But it seems in some situations, if a baron, or count, or whatever thought that some of their able-bodied men would be put to better use tilling the fields or something, they could try to arrange payment of scutage in lieu of providing troops.

This is interesting, because the idea of rich people simply buying their way out of their obligations and responsibilities is most assuredly an outdated relic of the past, along with witch burnings, and treating all diseases with leeches. Right?

“While I like taking over new lands, I do also like people giving me money….”

Levity, by way of lexical ambiguity

Apologies again for the long break; politics, and skyrocketing COVID numbers (which, insanely, is also somehow political in my country) have made it hard to focus on projects like this. I’d been trying to distract myself, but it took months to even get a one-shot session of a tabletop RPG off the ground. That finally happened, though, and I’d forgotten how much I liked running games for friends–even over Discord, with all its technical glitches. In a roundabout way, this brings us to today’s word, because of joking around with friends, and also the game’s title.

jerkin, noun – a long, close-fitting jacket, usually without sleeves

Learned from: Dungeon Master (Apple IIGS, Amiga, Atari ST, PC, SNES, Turbografx-CD, Sharp X68000, PC-9801, FM Towns)

Developed by FTL Games

Published by FTL Games (1987)

Dungeon Master was a great first-person dungeon crawler (or DRPG, as the genre is sometimes called today). The puzzles actually made you think, the magic system was very interesting in how spells were put together, and it was pretty damn challenging. It was also rather obtuse at times, particularly when it came to equipment.

Weapons came with different types of attacks (slash, hack, bash, etc.), and you could see via experimentation, which ones packed more oomph. But armor? There was no “defense” rating, or anything like that; all you had to go on was the picture, and the item’s weight. So, while you could infer that a breastplate would protect a character more than a silk shirt, was a tunic better or worse than a jerkin? Impossible to say. So, you just had to kind of guess your way through outfitting your characters, which made staying a live more difficult than it needed to be. Then again, it’s not like real-life gear tends to have numerical ratings for anything but temperature ranges for winter coats.

And now for the lexical ambiguity joke:

Enjoy this stock image, because googling “dungeon master jerkin” brings up some very…different results.

Something we all need right now

Well, it’s been awhile, hasn’t it? My apologies. The world has just gotten…well, to be a lot to bear, lately. I’d get home from work each day, look at social media, and just…not have the energy to want to do much of anything. The closer we get to the presidential election, the more heated and worrisome things have been getting. And oddly, it took the situation getting even worse for me to feel like getting back to this. Long story short, my workplace might’ve just gotten exposed to COVID today, and I need to do something positive to feel better. Which brings us to today’s word.

catharsis, noun – a therapeutic and/or cleansing release of emotions, often through art

Learned from: Katharsis (PC)

Developed by Metropolis

Published by Metropolis (1997)

Katharsis was a fairly unremarkable game, when you get down to it: a horizontal-scrolling shoot-’em-up, that was distributed via shareware, if memory serves. Its graphics were okay for a DOS game, with 3D backgrounds, and some decent particle effects, but the only thing that really sticks out in my memory is the name, misspelled and edgy though it is. I don’t even think I ever bought the full game–just played however many levels were included in the demo a few times, and then probably went back to Half-Life or something.

But it goes to show that even something small and unremarkable can have an impact on your life to some extent. And while it does feel good, getting back to updating this blog, I think I’m going to go find something more visceral to keep the catharsis going. See you again soon.

Horrible, yet inspirational in a way

Earlier this week, a regional landmark suffered a terrible blow. August had been a pretty dry month up until the end, and the sudden heavy rains we started getting caused the roof of a local theater to collapse. To add insult to injury, a section of the roof over the stage had actually been replaced, just a few years ago (that section stayed up). It’s a huge amount of damage to what had been a beautiful old building. And the real kicker? An initial investigation suggests that the rainwater pooled because the drainage channels had been blocked by pigeons, of all things. Freaking pigeons. That brings us to today’s word.

collet, noun – a flange designed to hold a gem

Learned from: Blasphemous (Switch, PC, Playstation 4, XBox One)

Developed by The Game Kitchen

Published by Team17 (2019)

There aren’t many “normal” items to find in Blasphemous, and the Dove Skull certainly doesn’t break that trend. The actual skull of a bird, described as being “drilled as a collet,” it’s a trinket you can equip to slightly bolster your defense. It’s slightly morbid, but compared to a lot of the items in the game, it’s not that bad.

I’m not going to go much in depth on the game today, because the damage to the Vista Theater is still so fresh in my mind. The photo below really illustrates how bad the situation is, but if you find yourself wanting to help, please consider making a donation to try and help them start putting the pieces back together. Thank you.

Finally, perhaps we can take something positive away from this. If something as common and unremarkable as pigeons can collapse a brick and mortar structure with their nests, maybe there’s a chance that normal folks like you and me can change the world on a large scale as well–just in a more positive context.

vista

Image credit to http://www.uppermichiganssource.com

Pluto is in marmalade: ill fortune!

I probably shouldn’t joke about this too loudly; given the propensity toward essential oils and goji berries that some people in my country have, I don’t want to give them ideas about regressing to Medieval “cures” for diseases. And this is related to today’s word, but first I’d like to apologize for being gone for so long. I was training someone in at work for a few weeks, and life in general had gotten more draining somehow. But I did find some time amidst all that to play a few games. Such as this one.

borage, noun – a flowering herb native to the Mediterranean; also known as starflower

Learned from: Astrologaster (PC, mobile)

Developed by Nyamnyam

Published by Nyamnyam (2019)

Astrologaster is sort of a fully-narrated choose your own adventure game. You play as “doctor” Simon Forman, a 16th-century astrologer who sets his sights on medicine after the stars tell him how to cure the plague (a cure he calls “strong water,” which includes, among other things, borage). The only problem is, he doesn’t have a medical license. Since posing as a doctor without a license is a crime in Elizabethan Londan, Simon sets out to acquire one the only way he knows how–not through study and scholarship, but through providing sound medical advice through astrology. What could possibly go wrong?

And it’s not just people’s health that you’ll be dealing with. You’ll also consult the stars to offer advice on investments, love affairs, and even military campaigns. Things can go horribly (and at times hilariously) awry, and you can intentionally sabotage people if you want, but it’ll make it harder to get the recommendations you need to get your license.

That is, of course, when Simon isn’t sabotaging himself. Without spoiling anything, I will say that he becomes a rather…unlikable character as the story goes on, doing things behind the scenes that the player (as far as I can tell) has no control over. This made it a bit of a chore to finish the game, in all honesty, because after awhile I wasn’t really sure I wanted to see him succeed. Still, there’s a colorful cast of characters, some solid voice acting, and writing that’s genuinely funny at times. If the overall premise sounds appealing, you’ll probably enjoy Astrologaster to some extent.

borage

Fun fact: While edible (and pretty), borage contains chemicals that may be carcinogenic. Not recommended for the treatment of plague.

What’s in a name?

If you’re like me, the current state of things has you pretty frustrated. I considered a bunch of words that would reflect different aspects of the aggravation I’m feeling about how poorly people (in my country at least) are responding to the COVID-19 pandemic, when I realized I could sum it all up in one. It’s not so much the word itself, but rather the game it’s from.

halitosis, noun – bad breath

Learned from: Aaargh! (Apple IIGS, Amiga, Amstrad CPC, Atari ST, Arcade, Commodore 64, PC, ZX Spectrum)

Developed by Binary Design, Sculpted Software

Published by Arcadia Systems, Melbourne House (1988)

Aaargh! is an early attempt at portraying giant monster battles in a game. But in the absence of licensed properties like Godzilla, Ultraman, or King Kong, the developers had to make do with a generic giant lizard, and an “ogre” (which, for some reason, they actually drew as a cyclops). The two monsters were basically sprite swaps, since they each had the same moves, though the ogre certainly got the short end of the stick, thematically. Instead of the lizard’s actual fire breath, he was described as having “halitosis, which is so bad it sets things on fire.” And yes, I dug up the manual to find the exact wording, after twenty-odd years. I’m dedicated. 😉

The game itself was technically less about beating up the other monster, and more about finding the eggs of a giant bird, hidden in a primitive village before your opponent did. (The actual type of bird is another word I learned from this game, but that’s a post for another time.) It was…okay for what it was trying to do, but there are reasons it was overshadowed by Rampage, which came out a few years earlier and offered more robust gameplay. Plus, there’s that title…

aaargh

Aaargh! indeed.

Does anybody really know what time it is?

While my Pile of Shame (TM) still has a ton of games in it, I figured the quarantine was a good opportunity to tackle some of the longer ones–JRPGs, and such. Recently, I finished the first Trails in the Sky, and I see why the Legend of Heroes series (which includes the Sky trilogy, the Cold Steel quadrilogy, and two un-localized games in between them) is so highly regarded by fans. The plot is a slow burn until the final chapter, but once it kicks into high gear, it leads to one hell of a cliffhanger. Anyway, today’s word…

tourbillon, noun – a watch mechanism designed to mitigate gravity’s effect on the movement of the gears

Learned from: Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky (PSP, PC, Playstation 3, Playstation Vita)

Developed by Nihon Falcom

Published by XSeed Games (2011)

Literally meaning “whirlwind,” the use of “tourbillon” in Trails in the Sky was in a more mechanical sense. Much of the society in the game is based around technology derived from ancient artifacts (naturally). Called “orbments,” these devices combine clockwork mechanisms and elemental crystals to produce everything from street lights, to airships, to weapons. And as with all steampunk-ish technology, things can always be fine-tuned, hence the inclusion of tourbillons in some tech to make it more stable/accurate.

There’s actually quite a bit more depth behind the history of the orbments, as well as pretty much every aspect of the world in this series. Hell, even most of the individual townsfolk you run across have individual names, agendas, and dialog that’s more than “Welcome to <NAME OF TOWN>!” The sheer amount of text here can weigh things down a bit, but if you’re the sort of person who’d, say, read all the books in Skyrim, you’ll probably love getting immersed in the history of Liberl. Even if you don’t look through all the extra stuff, the tension and interplay between various factions of the military, the Bracer guild (sort of an international police/mercenary force), and the ruling family is plenty intriguing on its own.

tl;dr: If Trails in the Sky is any indication, this series is an underappreciated gem in the West. And all the games that have been translated into English are now available on Steam, so you don’t even have to be a weirdo who owns a PSP, like me, to enjoy them!

trails_in_the_sky

It’s also got quite the colorful cast of characters.

Easter in quarantine

I’m not going to say “happy Easter,” because most of the things that people seem to like best about the holiday are things that they really shouldn’t be doing right now. If you’re having an egg hunt, I hope it’s indoors, or that you have a fenced lawn. Much as you miss your families, you really shouldn’t have them over for dinner. And if you’re smart, you’re not going to church, because if there are a bunch of people clustered together, the virus doesn’t care where they are. It’s understandable if this makes you feel sad, frustrated, or even guilty, but staying home and staying safe is objectively more important than putting yourself and others at risk, simply because tradition calls for it. And in a roundabout way, that brings us to today’s word.

biliary, adj. – of, or relating to the bile ducts or gall bladder

Learned from: Blasphemous (Nintendo Switch, PC, Playstation 4, XBox One)

Developed by The Game Kitchen

Published by Team17 (2019)

Blasphemous is essentially Catholic Guilt: The Video Game. It’s a 2D metroidvania full of quasi-religious imagery, where everything joyful is a sin, and if a person is suffering, that means they’re blessed. It’s twisted and grim, and a perfect example of a Kickstarter project done right. You play as the Penitent One in Silence (there are other Penitent Ones with different burdens they carry), as he tries to atone for whatever sins he’s committed, by slashing his way through an oppressive world suffused with twisted faith. Your sword is gradually piercing its way into your own flesh, you regularly anoint yourself with the blood of your foes, and your health items are biliary flasks (that admittedly look more like they’re filled with blood than bile).

In short, the game is metal. Less short, it’s a beautifully realized world, with great pixel art, plenty of secrets to find, and gameplay that’s a comfortable challenge. So if you’re stuck at home today, and looking for something new to play, consider giving this one a shot.

blasphemous

I could make a “he is risen” joke, but that’s low-hanging fruit. Also, bad grammar.